Monday, January 5, 2015

Barbara’s Journey ~ Seeking a Second Opinion




My breastfeeding journey began with the birth of my son in 2009.  I had what I like to call a “standard hospital delivery” meaning I had an epidural, Pitocin, lots of I. V.  fluids and a long labor.  When my son was born I experienced a postpartum hemorrhage which left me traumatized and exhausted.  I barely got to hold my son before he was whisked away to the nursery.  When I finally got him back, I was swollen from all the fluids I had received and we had trouble latching from the beginning.  I remember the nurse asking if she would like me to take him to the nursery and the words were barely out of her mouth before I responded YES!  I was so tired and an uninterrupted stretch of sleep sounded divine.  The nurse would bring him back in when he was hungry and he nursed heartily (and painfully).  I requested to see the lactation consultant several times and one finally stopped by the day we were scheduled to go home.  She put on a glove, stuck her finger in his mouth and declared “Well there’s your problem, honey!  He could suck the wallpaper off these walls!”  Apparently he had a very strong suck.  She told me to keep doing what I was doing and assured me his latch looked fine.  When I inquired if it was supposed to hurt so badly, she assured me it was.

 

So, off we went with our new bundle.  My husband had recently gotten a promotion and we had to move to a new town when I was around 38 weeks pregnant meaning my OB and all the resources I was familiar with were now an hour and a half away.  I can distinctly remember sitting with a boppy in my lap crying, trying to steel myself for the pain that was to come when I latched my son.  Eventually I began dreading him waking from a nap because that meant I would have to nurse him and it just hurt so badly.  I scoured the internet for information and finally made the trek back to my OB’s office only to be told that his latch was “perfect” and my bleeding nipples were par for the course.  I felt so defeated.  Finally, after about 2 weeks, I gave up on nursing my son and decided to pump exclusively.  I did so, waking every couple hours through the night to bottle feed him expressed milk and then sitting for another 30 minutes to pump.  This went on for almost 4 months before my milk began to dry up.  Again, I visited with my OB who prescribed a couple of different medications to try, but nothing worked.  I finally switched to formula and that was the end of my nursing relationship with my son.  I felt guilty but I kept those feelings hidden away.  I had a happy, healthy baby- how dare I feel guilty??

 

Fast forward 3 years.  We found out we were pregnant with our rainbow baby and my husband and I were over the moon.  During that time I had become a birth and postpartum doula and a trained breastfeeding educator, so I was determined to make this breastfeeding relationship work!  In the course of my education, I realized that my son more than likely had a lip tie and probably a tongue tie as well so I was prepared for my new little one to have the same. 

 

Lola was born on July 23 in the water into daddy’s hands and sure enough, we immediately noticed she had an upper lip tie.  I thought she had a tongue tie as well, but that wouldn’t be diagnosed for a while longer.  She, like her brother, had a nice hard suck but she nursed often and my milk was in by day 3.  She had a very hard time latching on my left breast and the soreness I so distinctly remembered from my son’s birth was making an appearance.  I was beginning to dread having to nurse her so I quickly arranged a home visit with an IBCLC for help.  She did an exam and agreed that she had an upper lip tie but didn’t feel it was hindering nursing and felt there was no tongue tie present.  She gave me some excellent tips for positioning and latching and left.  Things improved slightly but we still had trouble getting her to latch on my left side, even after chiropractic care.  During this time, my husband was a life-saver.  When I was so discouraged and ready to quit, he gently reminded me of what the lactation consultant had said and reminded me of why I was doing what I was doing.  He was there with a kind word and a hug at all the right times.  There were nights I was more than ready to throw in the towel and just give her some formula- I came so close as to actually boiling bottles at 2am and making up some formula but I just couldn’t bring myself to give it to her so it sat, staring at me, in my fridge for several days. 

 

After almost two weeks of struggling, I suspected there was more happening with her oral anatomy than was diagnosed so I sought out a second opinion with Mellanie Sheppard; I am SO very glad that I did because I credit her with saving my breastfeeding relationship.  I went to a latch clinic and she immediately noticed our sweet Lola had an upper lip tie that was most definitely hindering her latch, a tongue tie, and a recessed chin.  She explained in more detail the mechanics of why her latch wasn’t working and gave us recommendations to follow up with a pediatric dentist for lip and tongue tie revision and to seek out the care of a cranio sacral therapist. 

 

We immediately scheduled an appointment to have her ties released with Dr. Preece and got in with Frankie Burget, a wonderful cranio sacral therapist.  One visit with her and Lola was able to not only lay flat and relaxed but she could actually turn her head to nurse comfortably on my left side- something she had never done before.  It was a joyous moment to see my little girl lay open and relaxed as opposed to curled up in a little ball, so tight and unhappy.  Shortly thereafter, we had our revision done with Dr. Preece.  That also helped tremendously and while I couldn’t feel an immediate difference as I was hoping, one day about a week or two later I realized I was nursing almost pain-free.  We continued to see Frankie and she worked her magic and the changes we saw in her were remarkable. 

 

I now have a 12 week old who nurses beautifully and pain-free.  I no longer dread my baby waking- instead, I look forward to the quiet moments I can sit and nurse her.  I love seeing her smile as she looks up at me.  I feel like I’ve climbed the world’s highest mountain- I birthed my child naturally and now I’m feeding her naturally, too.  Most importantly, there is no more mommy guilt and I’ve let go of the past.  I finally got the birth I wanted and now I’ve got the nursing relationship I’ve always dreamed of having.

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