We Choose Breastmilk! - Andrea’s Journey

Definition of breastfeeding: suckling or nursing, giving a baby milk from the breast. For me, it is so much more than that. It's how I comfort my crying child when upset. It is how my kids get to sleep, how they relax. It is one way I know that they feel love. I started my breastfeeding journey for the first time over 25 months ago when my first child, my son, was born. When I was pregnant my husband casually brought up that I would breastfeed our son, as if it's the obvious thing to do. Before that I had actually never given it any thought to how I would feed my baby.

Everyone I knew used formula and I had only babysat for formula fed babies. So I set out to find information on breastfeeding because I am a person who likes facts. I immediately learned the benefits of breastfeeding. The nutritional value, the bonding, the naturalness of it and the fact it was free and helped with weight loss was a bonus! My mind was made up. That was that. I would breastfeed my children.

 I read blogs, I read books, I talked to a woman online who had experience with breastfeeding. I did everything I could to be prepared, or at least what I thought was prepared. When my son arrived I was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was for us. He latched right on. We didn't experience pain, we didn't have supply issue's, we didn't have problems of any sort. I was so scared at failing but learned that if I relaxed, mine and my baby’s instincts would lead us. In the beginning I had several people make comments on how "if I just gave a bottle or cereal he'd sleep longer", or how "he must not be getting enough from me because he nurses every 30 minutes sometimes". These responses didn't feel right to me. My gut told me we we're ok since he was gaining fine, we we're both happy and I was in fact enough. He is now 25 months old and still nursing strong having never had a bottle, cow’s milk, or any other type of drink except breast milk and water. That is an accomplishment I am proud to have reached.

When he was 15 months old I learned we were expecting! I was so thrilled and excited by this news. I also was in fear my milk would dry and my son would be forcefully weaned before he was ready. Around 14 weeks my milk started to dry up. Surprisingly my son was not fazed by this and continued on to dry nurse. I had severe nursing aversion at this point. It got so bad I would cringe when he latched. I started to resent him nursing and dreaded every time he asked. It was really rough and painful for months during pregnancy. I held on for him. I knew he was attached and not ready to stop. So, through tears, through personal discomforts, anxiety, and pain I held on in attempt to do what I set out to do, which is let him self-wean. Finally some time in my third trimester my colostrum came in and the aversion and pain stopped. This was a relief for both of us.

 Fast forward to present day; my daughter is here and we are celebrating three weeks of tandem nursing. She, like my son, took right to nursing. We have been able to avoid pain and supply issues once again. For this I am thankful. Tandem nursing is a mixture of things for me. It is both wonderful and frustrating. I love that I can nurse my babies and give them what they need. I love when I see my son reach over and hold my daughter's hand. I love looking down at both their faces as they get "milk drunk". I also get overwhelmed at times. It takes a lot out of me to be nursing two babies. I constantly have one or both on me. I don't sleep much because one is always waking to night nurse. I experienced nursing aversion with my son again, especially at night. It has been a struggle these 3 weeks with aversion returning, but again, I hold on for him. So for us, our journey is long and full of ups and downs. I reached my goal with him which was full term nursing to two years old. I now leave it in his hands to wean when he is ready. As for my sweet daughter, our journey is just starting. I enjoy nursing her and I feel blessed I can provide for her. I set the same goal as I did with my son, which is to make it to one year without any supplementation and then to hopefully reach two years or let her self-wean, whichever comes first. I am happy I can do this for my kids and I am happy that I have encouraged several friends on their journey with breastfeeding. I fully support a family choosing whatever route is best for them when it comes to nourishing their children. For us, we chose breastmilk and I am so happy we did.